I hate all girls vehemently.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
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