Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
