Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize