I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
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