I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
being pregnant is like rehab
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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