Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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