Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
