What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Are we still banned from the library?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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