dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
