Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
