I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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