My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Randomize
