Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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