My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
