honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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