If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
