real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
