So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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