Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
