We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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