A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize