Do you still have your period?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
