Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
