Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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