Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
