Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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