he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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