she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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