i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
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