I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Couch. On fire.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
