I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
