I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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