It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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