I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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