? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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