We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
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