I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
