i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
