I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
