You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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