Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
