you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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