Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize