hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
