everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize