6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
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