you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
