I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
false alarm. still invincible.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
