There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize