Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
