how can u be prego again
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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